The root of a plant is critical to its survival and thriving. Though the root is invisible; buried deep within the soil it determines the quality of the fruits which is visible. The depth of the root determines the height the plant will attain. The root also has an absorbing capacity; it absorbs nutrients and moisture from the soil from which it is planted and these are vital to the growth and development of the plant and these determine the quality of the fruit. So it applies, the root of success is self-concept. Self-concept has its origin from within but it showcases itself visibly for all to see in the choices we make in the divers areas of life and in our behavior. The greater the self-concept you possess; the greater the height of success you attain. Self-concept which is rooted inwards has an absorbing capacity that draws its influences from sources within the environment that you are in. And these sources in the environment that you permit to be an influence in your life will determine if you will produce the fruits of success or fruits of failure.

Self-concept is your entire belief structure acquired from childhood; what you experienced; what you saw (modeling) and what you heard (verbal programming) when young; all these were impressed in the mental slate of your subconscious mind. Self-concept is the beliefs you have about yourself; your abilities and your world. It is the seed that sprouts to produce our performance in every area of life and our effectiveness through life. Self-concept is the forerunner of all behavioral response to any given event or situation we encounter or experience through life. Your life can never rise above the self-concept within. Self-concept is the regulation that determines your performance which produces results in every area of life.

Self-concept could be termed the triangle of human effectiveness comprising of three parts; at the bottom part of the triangle is self-ideal. Self-ideal is the perfect person you want to be in every aspect of your life. It is the kind of person you admire most and aspire to become. In every situation you find yourself you can endeavor to ask yourself, “What will Jesus do?” then act accordingly. If you do not have a clear and positive description or vision of the qualities you want to possess and the kind of life you want to lead the two sides of the triangle which comprises of self-image and self-esteem will be erroneous, distorted and negative resulting in personality problems and consequently a failure-ridden life. People with high self-ideal live their lives on a higher level. The live lives based on the highest standard possible and they never compromise on those standards. However, if they mistakenly compromise, they are self-correcting, getting back on track to live their best. The higher the self-ideal, the higher will be the standard you set for yourself.  These categories of people perceive themselves to be deserving of success; they believe and expect that they are destined to succeed in everything they do and in every aspect of life. These people do not sell themselves by settling for less than excellence neither do they shortchange themselves by travelling through the path of least resistance. Consequently, they perceive their lives as being valuable and worthwhile and they become indispensable in the domain of their influence.

I was sexually attacked by stepdad at 12 – Funmi Mupapa

Self-image which is the mental picture or the “inner mirror” you have of yourself and your world. It is the way you see yourself and how you think about yourself. It is the “mental portrait” that you have carefully designed or created in your subconscious mind about yourself in every situation and event of your life. You look at the ‘inner mirror’ to determine how to behave; respond; react and perform. Self-image is the performance gauge of life. You cannot consistently perform or behave any differently on the outside than the self-image you uphold on the inside.

Self-esteem is the emotional aspect of your personality structure. It is how you feel about yourself. Self-esteem is the ability to like yourself or not. Self-esteem is the foundation stone that determines the quality of your relationships and the level of happiness or unhappiness you experience though life. A positive self-esteem hinges on two poles: how much you love, respect and value you which is reflected by how much you love, respect and value people; how much you love, respect and value yourself will determine how much people will love, respect and value you. The more competent and capable you are, the more you feel good about yourself and the more you like yourself the greater the confidence and competence level.

When self-image and self-esteem harmonizes with self-ideal it produces excellence and effectiveness.

In the words of Florence Shinn, “There is a place that you are to fill and no one else can fill, something you are to do, which no one else can do.” Therefore, in the domain of life you are equally as important as anyone else; however, some people are more popular or wield more influence than others. Never relegate your importance. You are important!